Wednesday, February 27, 2019
Saturday, February 9, 2019
Thursday, January 10, 2019
Foreign Affairs
Two days ago, I stepped off American Airlines flight #971 to
Port-Au-Prince Haiti. In a just a short couple minutes the din of American politics,
business as usual, dinner plans with friends, and the next sermon took flight
of my mind. I steadied myself and sought my sea leg balance for this culture
again, and by the time I exited the airport I was snapped to attention and
geared for the clanging and striving of pure poverty. It met me before I arrived
at the door but slammed me in the face as I pushed out of the building.
I have never found the words to conduct my thoughts to paper
in such a way as to paint the graphic picture a third world country brings to a
being. I know there are those out there who fluidly swerve back and forth
between cultures with hardly any effort at all. Not me. It’s more like
careening, awkward, and ill performed at best. I want to think the years and experience
have softened my approaches internally, and perhaps to one degree or another
they have. But still, the gentle caresses of a plush culture are deeply woven
into the fabric of my being, and my soft underbelly lacks stomach for the harsh
and brutal ways of the impoverished.
I tell my teams not to rush to judgement, but it’s hard.
Staring awkwardly in the vacant eyes of a child who you will only be left to wonder
what will happen to them is a tsunami of the soul one cannot pen, nor tongue
tell. It is a grief you will carry to your grave, and a theological question
that will play with the soundest theologies of God and men should you possess a
true soul for the unfortunate and the forsaken. I am not one to shake a fist in
the face of the Almighty, but this place is a true test of my endurance and faith!
Soon enough I am confident this land will swallow up my work
of flesh, devour it and spew it out on the ground like refuse. Gratefully, the
work I do is not for flesh alone. Seed planting is what we do, and when we are
gone, and the dust has settled, and the rain comes…new life will be found
pushing up through the harden soil, life of promise, and hope, and change. Good
will grow, that is my prayer.
When I walked out through the parking lot, and got in the
car with Robinson, I couldn’t help but notice the full airport parking lot. A
very different site for me. He said it was a sad day in the country, it seems
there is a gas shortage. As it has played out, it’s a yearly struggle here. It’s
quite a site to pass the gas stations and see 50-100 motorcycles strewn throughout
the parking area by the pumps, all waiting for one thing, fuel. Almost every motorcycle
taxi you see has a one-gallon jug tied to the back fender, dangling on a piece of
rope, a sign of the prepared. Rob has headed to the gas station at 4:00 am each
morning to make sure he can have enough gas to get his American friend around
and run a generator at night for a fan to keep him cool. What are the odds?
Yesterday we pulled a miracle, we setup and stood up our new
big tent at the project. It takes an army of guys to lift 1150 lbs. of fabric
21’ in the air! I can tell you, I was there! Our first try failed, and I was
ready to call it a night. It was pitch dark under the fabric and we had my pen
light and a couple phone lights trying to see what to do, did I mention that I
don’t speak Creole? And I have a couple good translators, but when they don’t
have a clue what you’re up too, it become a real fiasco. We did succeed, and
then I raced around tightening a few places on the tent to steady it overnight…
I was walking to the bathroom for my shower late last night
when I heard a terrible racket. I was momentarily confused, and then a shutter
went through my frame…rain! My tent was up, but still needed tightening for
water flow off the canvas, when they are not tight, they pocket water, and
water is 8.3lbs per gallon. Robinson cannot remember a time it has rained in January
in his lifetime! We fought to get it up, and another force tried to get it down.
When we got back to the property this am, I was greeted with what I feared, a huge
pocket of water threatening to tear our new tent down, I raced…no…I plodded
through deep mud to where the canvas was groaning under its uncomfortable load,
released two straps, dropped two poles and called for a bucket. It took ten
minutes of bailing, and unsettled panic inside me, before the strain was lifted
and I tightened up the canvas to safe proportions. Did I mention how good God
is.
I wrote to a friend this morning that I don’t quite know why
I find myself in such foreign affairs. I’ve never arrived at a place and been
there very long before I have found Him already there. I know He could just go
on without me, but he seems to keep pausing, looking back over His shoulder and
saying: “Are you coming?” What are you supposed to say to that but ‘yes Lord’?
And so I go, finding myself embraced by the most unusual arms of God, an orphan,
a widow, a pregnant mom due any moment, concern deeply etched on her face. There
will be no NICU for her baby, barely any proper medical care for herself.
When you can’t teach the people to fish, you better know how
to break bread like Jesus did! You better know the power of the one who fed 5000 with
two fish and five loaves of bread. This morning I packed a little extra in my
lunch bag. Two little boys spotted me getting into the Toyota and came on the
run. I gave them each a snack, and they asked for one for their sister. We told
them to go get their sister, for hungry bellies cannot be trusted! It was as I
suspected, older sister…and little brother came on the run…but I had enough.
Robinson forgot about a wedding he was supposed to do at
4:00 today, so it has left me with a little writing space. The clouds are threatening rain again tonight, but I am not bothered now. Actually, it has
worked out quite well because the rain has exposed a few other issues that
needed to be addressed at our new property. And better while I’m here to see,
than trying to explain it on the phone.
Paul says to be content in whatever circumstances one finds
oneself, I am still learning what that means, and over time, finding out it
means a lot more than I initially conceived. Here’s to all being content tonight,
trust me when I tell you that you have it far better that you can imagine. I
know we have some big mountains to climb in our country, just remember though,
we have climbing gear, imagine what it would be like if you had a mountain, and
nothing to climb it with. I suppose that would be the time have the faith to
cast the mountain into the sea, this is the culture and burden I find myself immersed
in tonight. We stopped in passed the old church property before noon today, there
were a few people there, gathering for noon prayer. As I walked to the front of
the church, I was struck to see a young girl already on her knees praying.
Great desperation or great faith on bold display for my afflicted American eyes
to see. I paused, and looked up to see God looking back over His shoulder again,
the question hanging between us… “are you coming?” I’m on my way!
Blessings to all from St. Marc.
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Monday, October 29, 2018
Validation
The sound of children playing and scratching on my tent in
the dark is the way my morning started. That dog pile of young boys asleep on
the floor early last evening apparently thought they had enough sleep at around
5:00 am. Light rudely blasted into my tent and a silhouette stood in the
doorway to the porch I called home for the last 7 days. I waved my hand to
signal I wanted the light back off to the figure surrounded by light, and it
when out. I tried to sleep for a few more minutes, but to no avail. So I got up
and put in another movie to allow the team a little more time to rest and keep
the kids calmer. We gave the kids a smorgasbord of breakfast bars too choose
from as we won’t need much for tomorrow morning, we will be hitting the road
early for Port. We went to the new property this morning via a school bus. It
was a big adventure for the kids. We arrived at the property and I set up a
little tent for shade and was getting ready to lay bases when someone carried a
phone to me and said Pastor wanted to talk to me. They were at the property with
the Toyota and trailer but couldn’t make it up the hill. We ended up removing 100
lbs. of pipe from the trailer as well as two of the tent packages. The pipe was
carried up the hill by Haitians and I was finally able to use a different route
and up the hill we went. With the work we had done on the road to help repair
the water damage we were also able to run the two-wheel drive truck up as well.
We compiled all the goods back in the trailer and parked it out of the way while
they pour the floor to our Well Shop/storage area for rigs and goods. A huge
bonus we discovered while we were up at the property is that the metal roof of
the building reflects the sun’s heat, and it’s actually a very cool place to
work. This will be wonderful to have in the days ahead. We were also able to set
up one of four perimeter solar lights that will aid in property security. We
are really excited about this because when it gets dark in Haiti, it really
gets dark. No city night light glow, just a jet-black sky that vacuums up all
light and makes the stars truly sparkle. I have seen these lights working way
high on the mountain and it used to confuse me why they had power up there and
not down in the city until I found out they were solar powered units. At the
end of the week I am not where I planned to be, but I certainly am not where I
was when I arrived. Patience is a coveted fruit, it grows slowly, it is a
virtue which is an acquired taste, much like coffee. I say coffee, because it
is a flavor I have never come to fully appreciate. I drink it in Haiti with lots
of cream and sugar, never ask me to drink it black! That is the way I am with
patience. I need a lot of sweetener and some cream. I covet it dearly, but I am
wired to do: “do or do not, there is no wait” is my catch phrase. While I have
drunk deeply at the well of patience this week and have typed out my blogs laced
with cream and sugar, a bitter taste remains behind. I hope ten years of
working in Haiti has made me a better man, but days like these where my
patience is truly put to the test, I feel failure eating at my frame. I cast my
eyes to the hills from where comes my help, my help I say, ‘comes from the
Lord.’ He is in charge of all things in this HIS Haiti ministry. As I write
this blog I am moving back and forth between words setting up our annual orphanage
birthday party. This is quite the business, a serious endeavor that takes
several man hours of time, a true labor of love to validate these kids ‘American
Style’. Criticize me if you will, as I had my meeting with these golden hearts yesterday,
I confessed to them we are not a family replacement. I told them this is broken
attempt to bring a place of protection and a safe environment for them to grow
up in. We love them but are rarely with them. Hence, a birthday bash, a time of
validation, a time we burn into their memories how much they are loved and held
close in our hearts. As the ladies and kids were finishing up coloring and
decorating banners with each child’s name on it some of the kids were helping
color theirs. Kenly appeared with a piece of paper in hand, he unfolded it to
reveal last year’s banner with his name on it. He has kept it safe this entire
year. Confirmation is rare gift we get. In the moment that banner was unfolded
I knew we had validated this young teenager in a plausible way. On that note, I
have a party to attend. Blessing to all from St. Marc.
Teenagers
We are having another sleep over. We have made a few
adjustments from the sleepover tow nights ago, no kids sleeping in front of
fans, they get freezing cold at 70 degrees! The little boys are asleep in the
middle of the big room on a comforter. It funny, they dog pile like a litter of
puppies. Deloris awoke yesterday morning to 5 girls sleeping in a space no
wider than 4 feet right beside her bed. It’s hard to even capture on camera.
Today was very busy with church this morning and orphanage meetings all
afternoon. I’m bone weary tonight, but my voice is returning! Poor Lee has lost
hers today. She was our lingual rock star this morning, the Haitians always
love her little speech to them in Creole. There was a special moment when Ray introduced
himself and his age of 16. An audible ripple went through the tent of shock and
awe. He is a tall, very tall, drink of water! They often ask what we feed our
children. It’s pretty funny to see their reactions. I know I always say this,
but it is amazing how many people fit on our church property in town. At one
point I looked and saw that they had attached a blue tarp to the front of the
tent to help create shade for the morning service, a man was standing in the middle
holding the tarp up off of the heads of the people. Service went well, I had
enough voice finally to talk. Lunch was our Sunday afternoon staple, macaroni
and cheese with hot dogs. Haitians love their hot dogs. So it was a very happy
crowd at the orphanage. We held an orphanage meeting and then met with our five
teenagers, yes that’s right, five. One of them can be a handful, so we have
some fresh challenges for our staff. The meeting with the kids was well
received, they are such brave and intelligent hearts and beings. I pulled out the
drawings for the new orphanage and shared it with them, they were so excited
and pleased. They did ask if they would each have their own rooms. I told them
we wouldn’t have the luxury of that right now. What we have and take for
granted, their question made my heart cringe. The men worked fast and furiously
on the Toyota today, it won’t be done tonight as they need the electrical mechanic
to do the wiring, he will start at 6:00 in the morning. But they did have the
new engine running tonight. It would be nice to have it roadworthy for our last
day on the ground here. We have much to do, but a big event of this trip with the
kids is a baseball game. We will do this at the new property in the morning.
There is a lot of excitement among the children for this event. Sean has played
a lot of baseball in his life and it’s something he really wanted to do, so we
have gloves and bats, it should be a great time. We will report in on its
success or failure later! It is time to get some shuteye, the kids will be up
very early, especially the young ones that have fallen fast asleep on the
floor. Rest well and God bless all.
Sunday, October 28, 2018
Tow Strap
I am busy in sermon prep for the am service tonight, so this
will be a short post. We had a splendid day today, immersed in so many
activities. The school meeting went well today, we just needed to connect with a
few more children, but that is the way it is every year. We’ll get there. It
was a very warm day, but we did manage to get the trailer off the dock. The
first thing I wanted off the trailer was the new motor for our Toyota, just to
get rid of weight and make room to be able to remove all the supplies that need
to stay in town. Rob called me from the mechanics yard to tell me he had the
trailer and I was supposed to come to him on a motorcycle taxi to see about
getting it off. When I arrived, there were a couple guys sitting with Robinson
under a shade tree on the hood of a vehicle I doubt will ever see another road
day in its life, actually, there is no life left in it! He told me the mechanic
was in Port. Just like everything else in this trip. I had to laugh. I said let’s
go, we can get it later. I had seen our motor hoist was buried deep under the
chaos left by inspectors, so I had no way to unload it. Rob asked me if I was
sure, and I said yes. About this time our truck driver came around the corner with
a tow strap he immediately reached down and wrapped around the motor. He
stepped out and disappeared for another moment or two before returning with an
8’ piece of bent 2” pipe that was as smooth as silk. And then I knew. Two more
guys showed up and four of us lifted the motor an inch. I thought to myself,
well this will be the end of me. But now the Haitians are getting louder, one
of them motions for me to get out of the trailer and takes my hand hold on the
pipe, and then suddenly there are about 20 Haitian hands on that pipe and motor.
I needed this moment on video I thought, and so I stood there while these guys
took that motor and put it at a neighbor’s house by the mechanic for
protection. Folks, it’s a thirty second video, and then it was done. I joked with
the mechanic when he showed up at the church later that I wondered what time I
could get my Toyota tonight. We laughed. A few minutes later Rob came to me and
said the mechanic was going to do the motor for free but needed to pay some
extra help, so he could have it to us tomorrow! Part of me doesn’t believe it, after
the week I’ve had I’m plenty conditioned to not believe, but part of me still
hopes. Then another part of me, the part that watched 10 Haitians unload and
move a motor 50’ in 30 seconds, believes it just might happen. That would be a
golden nugget in this chaotic trip! It would be awesome for a plan we have for
Monday, it’s been a pain without the team transport vehicle. As I bumped along
in the back of the truck today, sweltering in the mid-day sun with a few of the
orphans, I was grateful for the ride, but miserable at the same time. So, it
was a forward progress day today. We will see what time affords, we have very
little left this trip. We have two full days of activities stretched out before
us. Pray we end on a high note. I’m speaking in the morning and my laryngitis
has taken a turn for the worse today. Fortunately, I will have the aid of
translator, but I’m not looking forward to squawking away to a couple thousand
people in the morning! Blessings from St. Marc.
Friday, October 26, 2018
Goat herder
Good evening from Haiti. So much for the cool weather! Today
things heated right up, in more ways than one, but that is Haiti. One thing I
never miss yet when I leave here to go home is the rooster’s crowing at 3:00
am. It’s not bad when you can block it out with fan noise, which works more
often than not, but then there are nights that are the exception, like last
night. I guess I get now why Haitians like chicken so much, it’s a staple you
have because you have to kill them to silence them! On to bigger and more important
things though. Kelly, Rob and I hit the road early this morning to see about
starting our well machine and getting it under the cover of our new building.
We were successful, even though we encountered nasty biting ants, huge spiders
and their webs, and a big hornet’s nest. They will be pouring the floor in our
building next week and that will give us a much-needed equipment storage space.
Another early morning blessing was the opportunity to engage with the orphans when
they were just getting up and around. Their energetic hearts were a treasure to
experience. I believe this has been a necessary trip to reconfirm these beautiful
lives that have been placed in our care. Several are at challenging ages, and
this country is anything but kind to hopes and dreams. This has been a great
team to redress the needs of their young hearts. It’s particularly tough when
they go a whole year without us. I am constantly reminded this mission is
nothing if not about the hearts we are meant to touch and change by being that
loving hand of God extended. As I type away on my computer, they are all staying
with us at the Mission House tonight, enjoying popcorn, Kool aid, and Peter
Rabbit. A room full of their laughter, and one might imagine how Monster’s Inc.
actually became a thing. One by one they will drift off to sleep, cherishing this
moment in the brave history of their lives. Swept along by the complexity of
the mundane, they must at some point own this life, or die trying. As I bump along
their dust laden streets, the drift of a unique smog all their own grays the
sky, I wonder at the stories they could tell. The child whose father breaks
rocks to make gravel every day for a living. He doesn’t come home and kick off
his shoes, turn on the TV and crack a can of beer. He comes home to a dark hut
without electricity and running water, with something called a door, he sleeps tired
and hungry with his children on the floor, to die and be buried in a nameless
tomb, no epitaph, just the fact that he was here, and now he is gone. I think about
these things because that is something of the story line of the lives of our
orphans. For most of these kids their history has been erased, they have fake
birth certificates, the only sense of belonging is the one they get a few days
of the year when we show up. Don’t get me wrong, I think our staff and director
are some of the best people in the world, but even Robinson confessed to me he didn’t
ever know love until he came to the United States. The harshness and brevity of
life here border on a stroke of evil almost too much to comprehend. To this darkness
we are called, and to this calling we try to remain faithful. Apparently, I
will get the comedy award of this trip with the Haitians. There were two goats
at the orphanage that are a part of a birthday feast for the kids this weekend.
As we were leaving the house and bringing all the kids to the Missions house to
stay, the goats could not be left behind for fear they would be stolen. As I
was trying to leave one of the kids handed off his charge to me. And I happened
to have the stubborn one of two. I led out on a determined mission not to have
anyone else have to deal with this feisty little creature. As the Haitians tell
it the poor goat never had his feet on the ground. That is not true, because for
most of the way I had to drag the poor little guy along. He would jump into the
air and land on all four feet set dead against me, but I kept walking. By the
time we arrived at the Mission house I wasn’t sure who was most tired, me or
the goat. But he immediately started head butting the other goat so I figured
he had fared better than myself. I have never seen Robinson laugh so hard at
the telling of the story. I guess I will live on in infamy as the bizarre
American goat herder! I guess I’m grateful to have brought some comedic relief to
an otherwise repressed culture. One other point of clarification, you experience
some of the greatest joy people can live in while here in this country. But the
markings of deep sorrow and hardship are carved upon every face as they carry
added weight to the normal burden called ‘Time’. A disappointment to our day
was that after spending several hours at the dock today, we still don’t have
our trailer. Now it will be a bonus if it gets out before we leave. Time to lay
a new plan for our setbacks, and finalize what this trip was really about, and
in case you’re wondering, no my voice has not returned. I’m beating out my
frustration on my computer keys. I hope this post is not overdone! Blessings to
all from a heated-up St. Marc.
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